Im a victim of Revenge Porn – Im 20 years old and thought this could never happen to me (Anonymous)

I recently became a victim of revenge porn. I felt as if my world came to an end.

Words cannot express how I feel right now.  I feel as if my life will never be the same, I cry every single day and ask God why it had to be me. I wouldn’t want anyone close to me to experience what I am experiencing. I cannot cope with the stress, it’s affecting my studies and work.

Sometimes I think it isn’t worth living, that’s how much it has affected me.

My Story is a bit strange but this is what happened. Last year June 2014 I logged onto my Facebook to find that pictures I had sent to my boyfriend at the time was posted on my wall,  but it was from his Facebook. I called him straight away and started crying, assuming the mother of his children had hacked into his email and posted the pics on my Facebook page.

My ex said he would sort it out I asked him for his Facebook and email password so I could delete the pics, which is what I did.  Nothing appeared or happened again after i had deleted the photos. Two  weeks ago the pictures had been sent to some of my Facebook contacts, I called my ex and told him what had happened. He informed me that it wasnt the mother of his kids that had posted the original photos but that it was another girl that became obsessed with him and was jealous of the love he had for me.

So she basically hacked through his phone when he left it lying around.

I felt betrayed

I called the police after I had gathered some information on the girl and gave it to them. So they started to investigate my claims. I reported the Facebook page that she had used to send my pictures.

It’s not easy at all, I hardly like talking about it. I just feel ashamed.

I contacted the Revenge Porn Helpline but they only gave me little advice. I was very emotionally and they gave me your details for someone to speak to, as you had also experienced the same. I need some advice, because it’s so hard.

Hands on heart, you know the saying of you don’t know how something feels until you experience it yourself, I now totally agree with it.

I get really emotional to the point I can hardly talk. My only worry is that the police will find it difficult to get hold of her. My mum realised there was something wrong with me because I looked miserable and had lost weight. I had to tell her what was going on, I told my older sister and some of my female cousins because he pictures had been sent to them and I felt I needed to explain. My brother and my dad dont know!

I am struggling to come to terms with what has happened to me and I am in my second year at University. Some days I struggle to concentrate and find that I am constantly crying. I dont want to eat as I feel so distressed.

I was so glad to eventually talk with you over the phone and found that although the torment and shame was unbearable, at last I found someone who understood. You have been helping me through this and I am grateful.

Although I provided the police with lots of evidence and gave them the name of my ex boyfriend, because i belived he knew more than he was willing to tell and was after all the cause of the problem because I had told him to delete the photos when we were together and obviously he didnt. The police has now come back to me after several months and have dropped the case for lack of evidence.

I feel traumatised by the whole event from when it happened, to going to the police and constantly ringing them for updates but to find out it was all a waste of my time, my tears and my energy. I am trying to rebuild my life but at times this continues to be very hard. I know I had enough evidence but feel that the police did little to really help.

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